After being with Ana this summer, I lost 20lbs. Somehow now that I am back at University I have not stopped stuffing my face with pizza, croissants, bagels, pasta, cheese and everything fatty you could think of and gained the 20lbs right back. Today I had a panic attack because as much as I knew eating was going to make me fat, it didn’t really hit me until today. I FEEL SO OBESE. I hate my boobs that grew back and the squishy fat covering my ribs and shoulder bones. I don’t even have a waist anymore, just fat rolls!!!! Ugh.
So.
I am only eating fruits, vegetables, water, tea/coffee, diet pills, gum (and alcohol) and hitting the gym every day. This HAS to be fixed. I can’t live with myself if all I am is a frumpy pile of fat.
Today started with a skim latte and ham and cheese croissant, however then I had my panic assault and am now not going to consume for the remainder of the day. Additionally I’m going to the health club later. I want to be 110lbs by using Christmas.
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